If it ain't broke...

Audrey C asked me if I'd have a look at her printer. Expecting this to be a simple job - probably cleaning the print heads - I popped down late on Monday afternoon. As I sat down I noticed a surge protector on the desk, unopened in its packaging. It's the type that also protects the phone line, and she has a good quality wireless router, so it needing fitting sooner rather than later. Would she like it done while I was there? It should only take five minutes. Yes please.

As is the case for most folk, the wiring under the desk was doing a fair impression of spaghetti, so it took about half an hour to trace where the router was plugged in. At this point an alarm sounded in the house, and a disembodied voice said "Are you OK, Mrs C"? Weird, but nothing to do with me. This happened twice more, and I had visions of ambulances screaming sirens as they kicked up the gravel on the drive. Perhaps it did have something to do with the fact that I had my hand of the phone socket each time the voice said "Are you ok"? It seemed increasingly likely.

Unfortunately the socket for the phone alarm is behind a big bookcase. Undaunted, we moved the books, but all appeared in order at that end.

Back in the study, closer inspection of the suspect socket showed that that one wire was loose. Waggling it set the alarm off! As I said, if it ain't broke...

By now my timetable was completely wrecked, but at least I only had to fix the printer. Cleaning the heads did nothing, but it was asking for a change of cartridge, which Mrs C had helpfully provided. Read instructions (yes, really). Remove tab at top and tape from underside. Tab removed. Turn over to remove tape, and wonder why hands feel wet. Turn back to reveal pools of ink in several colours. Recover just in time to prevent drops wrecking carpet...

Condemned printer and offered to obtain another one. Now all I need is someone to pop down and fit it for me. Anyone fancy the job?!